Just short of 80 hours now. It feels like I’m dying… or to be more semantically accurate, ‘me’ is dying. I wasn’t aware of how much changes with the removal of a seriously masochistic behavior like smoking. I’ve got this notion now that I can be however I want to be. It is, of course, just another illusion, I always could, but that’s something I know only intellectually. The obvious next step is, if I can be however I want to be, then how is it that I am, in general? What is my normal mode of being? Right now, I don’t feel that there is one, and I can make it into whatever I want it to be. I’m not sure I’m ready for that kind of responsibility. ;]

In other news, I’ve been putting away about 6000 calories a day since I quit smoking. I averaged 4000-4500/day before quitting. I wonder if this will stay.

Reading “The Science Fiction Hall of Fame, Volume I: The Greatest Science Fiction Stories of All Time, Chosen by the Members of the Science Fiction Writers of America” (Tor Books), it’s a lot of really good old school sci-fi, when sci-fi was actually intellectual, instead of the ‘space opera with promiscuous sex’ genre you see a lot of today.